My good friend is going to Germany. So I went and said farewell.

After an 8dollar pint of lemonade. -Wtf- (still alcohol free)

I went and watched the Lego movie. It was great.

I managed to acquire a a denim one-piece for dressups. And there-after started jumbling words.

“mouse” = murdered in the house

“milk” – mink and silk combined together as a curtain…

I informed work bosses of my Uni plans. They were exceptionally understanding. “You can’t work in a cafe forever”.

-that’s irony right there people.

Fears faced, no drama.

I exercised! Alas, my knee is destroyed. 😦

No shakespear, regardless: A wonderful day.

A beautiful hot-hot day.
Just going with the flow.
Is there a better way?
I bought a gift for bro!

Bright eyed and excitable,
But the still more to do.
Now I’ve plans with a crazy rabble!
For now its in the stew.

I’m scared of the future
What will it be like as my past
The decisions need to suit-yeah?
It’s coming up so-so fast.

The fuel for today was 7 Seeds. Service, coffee, salad. Brilliant!
A lunch with my good friend Jasper W.
Recently abandoned by his girl. “Fresh Start 2015 bullshit”. I hope he’s ok granted, I know he can do better.
That guy has prospects.

Moving on.

“Skydiving for your birthday bro?”
My friend told me he’d hate it as a gift.
But I’ve decided to challenge my brother on this one.
Guts or Glory style.
I won’t be there for his birthday sadly,
I’ve just locked in a festival.
I’ll be working, working hard on my floes.
Selling coffee to the masses.
Best Drug! -no drinking 2015-
Over and under the rainbow.
Life is crazy like this.
I’m pleased.

And to finish the night with my two best friends.. STING-PONG.
This is living last time I checked.
Not a bad little gig.

I think I’ve missed my daily post with this one.

But look, it goes like this. Yesterday’s… (the other days) post was on time -just.
I was doing things, and still I had that list.
Today I ticked boxes.
Today I’m late.
But I feel like production levels are up.
Tomorrow is going to be even more so.

UNI STUFF. tick

I even rewarded myself with a new set of wireless headphones.
Its funny how a purchase can make you feel like its the turning point in your life. |
I think I get where people can be addicted to their possessions, and the accumulation of goodies.
So materialistic you are. Consumerist you have become. YOLODA!

A $250 dollar pair of headphones, making my day. I never though it would happen, that i’d be that guy.
I don’t listen to music when I run, I don’t like to run near cars or other people. It’s an activity I gladly do alone, to clear my head and think. Exercise makes me happy, without it I would melt away in the dark.

Energy for life.
Love life.

All that nonsensical exercise endorphin talk that skirts around the idea of poetry, so stripped back and simple you might call it brainless.

So much to do, and yet i’m stagnant.
People always have things to do.
but you always have a choice in how you spend your time.

Think of all the things you could do. -right now-
make a list.
From that list how many can you achieve today.
This is what I need to be doing in 2015.
Kicking goals, ticking boxes, enjoying what I do.
Have a goal, and revel in each step towards its completion.

I want to trim down.
I need to exercise more,
call the hospital,
call uni,
change over my phone,
read my book,
buy my brother a present
do research on the the world cup
really find out what fracking is
call mum
fix my computer
box up my things
choose my university courses
buy dad a nice tent
purchase some RM williams boots
get a massage
catch up with Tilde.
Learn french
clean my room
clean the bathroom
go to bed earlier
read some Shakespear
brush my teeth
buy wireless headphones
get an external harddrive
talk to my cousins
wash my sheets
book flights

Just off the top of my head…

Strange, somehow today has been longest day.
I woke up and went to work at 5.30.
I currently have a man-cold, the flu, whatever.
It rained and rained and the cafe was quiet enough for me to go home at 10.30.

Buckets and Buckets of rain.
I bought chocolate and vegetables to make myself better.

Home and sunburt from the day before I felt inspired. JOG TIME.
And so I ran. Refreshed, tight in the left calf though.

Home again, I ate pasta and fell asleep in the bath, listening to a music playlist I put together.

Awake again the bath now quite cold.
I jump into bed and watch Porco Rosso. What a class film.
Again, asleep.

Awake again I look at the texts asking me what i’m doing.
-nothing obviously-
In the wrong headspace for such a bland explanation so I went looking in my notes for the name of an art piece I enjoyed when visiting Spain years ago. Madrid. Sofia I think. Yes.

The piece talked about being sick, and how people look after you when you are sick.
And then how the author became obsessed with the idea that life is best, being looked after.
No expectation. 0% effort. Society will carry you.
I hated it and loved it. Such a spin on my fathers mentality that I’ve been instilled with.
“If you haven’t got your health you haven’t got much”.

The search continues for the name of the work alas.

Later I ate an iceberg lettuce, half a tin of peaches and half a block of chocolate.
What a treat.

I went for a jog and missed the Australia game. 4-0 to the green and gold. O-MAN!

Bed again for the 4th time today. I’m sick but the health bar is full.
Don’t worry Dad, don’t worry everybody.
Look after the people that need it.
I’m O.K.

Today I made plans for 2018.

Today I had toast for breakfast

Today I tanned for hours, without sunscreen.

Today I called her, at long last.

What is it with having a “feeling”. What kind of person gets a gut instinct. And how do you express an entirely out of the blue thought?

When a person gets an inkling that something might happen. How do they deal with it.

My mum would always voice her concerns. “Bye Mum, me and my friends are going to play in the quarry, throw rocks at each-other, fashion swords from sticks and just go berserk”. -back for dinner, no worries- Right?
Of course not. Mum wouldn’t let me out at all, if that was the case.

But lets say i’m fifteen, its the middle of the day and i’m walking to the city.
“Be careful, I’ve just got a bad feeling O.K!” – Great Mum, or should I say Miss Clavel. What am I supposed to do with this seemingly hocus-pocus warning. Am I being careful of anything in particular? Nothing bad ever happened. (mum was always on the alert and always wrong). correct?

So my mum voiced her thoughts, wild and unfounded warnings. Spooky if you ask me.
Having grown up with this my whole life, I have a common practice whenever I think “worst case scenario”.

I understand where she was coming from in some respects. And I’ve picked up a rather annoying habit of voicing my own strange thoughts.
My very own Murphy’s Law, protection against bad things happening.
“Say it out loud, so it doesn’t happen”. SIMPLE.

I went to see a football game this eve, beforehand I went for a jog (2015 health kick and all that).
Alone on my jog, mind wandering I thought.
“There’s going to be a terrorist attack”.
What a strange, strange notion.
Quickly now let me address, I do not live in fear nor do I have the slightest understanding of radical movements.
So I mentioned this thought to my friends -mentioned in the hope that it wouldn’t happen, like all bad thoughts I have- and lo and behold! Nothing of the sort.

But the reaction I got from my friends made me think twice about sharing my scary thoughts.
Truly though, I don’t think I’ll hold back when my brain is firing out worst case scenarios. But I did freak them out, unintentionally.
“why would you say that” said a friend.
I was shocked at the reception I got and how my frame of mind could be so misaligned from that of my friends.
UNTHINKABLE and UNACCEPTABLE, the thought and then practice of vocalising what your brain has fathomed.
Shame on me.

“Touch wood” I guess is what many people do.
Others sit quietly and hope for the best.
Try not to jinx us, one might say.

I say it, because it could happen but it won’t if, I say it.

I went a bit Dexter Morgan on the garage.
Cling film, carpet and plastic on the walls and floor. The stage was set.

Filling empty egg-shells with paint and throwing them at canvas is a joyous release I really cannot explain.
The indulgence of it all, the glee and elation I feel. The fright of a possible miss, the eruption of colour as the egg breaks into a hundred, tiny pieces. The splat, splash and spatter. Akin to a fly on the windshield of a fast moving car.
Drive-by art.

I have no talent for the straight lines of drawing nor the relish of painting. But hand me an egg filled with paint and I’ll call it art until the cows come home.
Today was a good day. Paint everywhere, but the crime scene was relatively easy to clean up, all things considered.

The housemates will never know.
&
The works continue to grow.

So we begin 2015.
Everyone is on a new diet.
Everyone goes for a jog.
Drink less, eat healthy, be more this, do less of that & try new things.

What have we learnt? Or should it be learn’t…

What % of people follow them through? Do we know what’s good for us? Will these small or even large changes
really change us? What’s 365 days without alcohol going to do to me? Life isn’t determined by 365 days.
It’s the 9000 days before and the 40000 days after your little beerless stint. -so what’s the point-
I really truly don’t know, but its a start right?
Maybe I just want to be a cheap drunk next year. Maybe in the short term i’ll save a lot of money.
I might even spend more hours doing something slightly more productive.
Save some brain cells too along the way.
Hang on this is all sounding like a good idea.
HOW MUCH LEMONADE DID I DRINK TONIGHT.

So i’m currently reading a series by Steven Erikson. Its depth and quality amazes me.
S.E’s ability to write so fluidly from one character’s perspective to another is immense.

I need some books in between tombs though, so I might pick up ‘Perfume’ again.
Too many books not enough time. Life always seems to get in the way. I should endeavour to make time.

“hello only ends with goodbye”