My eye is still twitiching.
I really ought to check that.

I want an outdoor spot in hobart that gets the sun, has wifi and does table service.
Go home Pat you’re drunk.

Beautiful day, and here I am just checking out insurance.
Too much!

This is me not going to bed earlier.

Mum is sick and sad.
Dad is a man of contrast within.
My sister cannot build a fire.
And my brother has moved away.

I cut ties,
but wish for more.
I’ll I once was,
But the need laps at my soul.

My ankles swell and
My eyelids tire
The circulation around my
body, fails me.

I tired,
And tell myself
“earlier to bed”
So here I am,

Doing just not that.
The future is exciting
My future feels bleak.
I’m conflicting

Confused,
Angry
LAZY
Frustrated,
Ashamed
Impatient.
Severed
Hopeful.
Wishfully thinking,
Wanting, waiting,
Asking myself deep withing.

WHAT CAN I DO.
SHOULD I DO NEXT.

Bed.

Cleaning my room.
Comedy last night.
Spent the whole day in bed.
Sick sick sick.

Up and down goes the roller coaster.
I tire, how do I find the inner strength I have possessed until now.
Sleep needed, and sleep and sleep. ||

I let myself down . Jobs need doing.
Set the fire, relax.

every word can be made into a pun.
Life is great.

Terrible waste of my life.

New plan, fix the flat by 15th August.
Things are grating me, need an early night.

The word strong, overused to uselessness.
But i mean it. But this but that.
Punish. Punish yourself. Self immolate. Find the words, hold nothing back. Talk over the top of perople, be your own version of a monster. Version?
Personify. Kill and drink blood, you need to energise. Babble.
The mail is here, connections. From the outside world.
Push.
Sweat! Stay hungry, do as you please, but stay focussed and motivated. Push boundaries, don’t get tied down.
Juggle adapt your. Brainhas. The ability for so much, you’re only limited by the walls you create. Sleep eat rest enjoy company of others have ideas be UNIQUE!
Create your own language, be a fighter pilot with your words and ideas,
Gel!
Wax!
Strong, maleable, wear gloves. Don’t get sick.
Become todays international man of mystery. Jog! Drink!
Bite yourself, see how much you bleed.
Your tongue is a whip, but it remains coiled, you choke on the coil.
Be poetic. Be succinct, accurate and real.
Become unreal. Challenge what you can.
If giventhe chance demonstrate! Remonstrate!
Bluff. Stay warm, bathe yourself.
Lie, cheat and exercise demons of others.
Become a demon.
Fix your phone,
Melt butter with your mind.
Travel to warmer climbs.
Delve to the centre of the earth,
Look inside yourself. Take it seriously.
Dig it.
Be a soul man.
Be the solder, that holds ya…
Friends together,
Resistant to nethers.
Believe in fate,
Hope that you’ll look back and the map of your journey is filled!
Crammed with junk like an old supermarket. Vegetables grown mouldy, new volatile creations. Spores and banana trees sprout. The colours!

SANDY! How was paris. The Taj in a sandstorm, what are the chances. New life.
I stare at you.
The others want you as a rebound. I am not that shallow.
I am a puddle.
But you shall not step in me. You only see a dark muddy reflection of yourself.
I will meld. There are ripples, splash, spatter, cool.
But your gale will pass.
Bit down on me and bleed from your gums. I am liquid.
No ozmosis will take me as a part of you.

My skin is dry, cracked and dehydrate’ rub into me a solution.
I go round. Not lost, not confused or bamboozled. The solution isn’t there. The waterfall is there but each time i go over, i drown, gasp, and stay afloat.
I await the true fall.
For now i’ll skip, out on gloves, explore and share.
Devestate me how you will, i’ll bounce back currant as ever.

Here here
Here hear
Hear hear
Hear here.

I don’t know if it was emotional blackmail.
I don’t know if i’m the one that’s full of shit.
We don’t know eachother, shall we see how much we can lie.
Or is it truths we tell, in all their beauty?
Paint your own picture.
But. I’m scared
I don’t believe i’m good at this art.

I feel (like), wriggling in my eye-lids are maggots.

Been a big week!
I had a beer last week. Broke my non-drinking.
Been drinking home brew.
Shot down Bex.
Shot down Eloise.
**just friends girls**

Blacklist!
Hanging with the gangs.
Feeling good. Strong even.
Eating lots, all the energy!
Need to catch up on some sleep.
Nude swim tomorrow morning. Going to be pretty cactus.
A fair bit of time on the cid train. All that sensory goodness.
Big love, touching shoulders giving hugs and respecting style.
Compliments and digging fashion.

Brainwaves of the over tired.
iPhone connected kettles. (Turn on the kettle before you’re home)
See through toasters, so you can judge the toast cooked-ness.

JOKE:
How do you become a great mountain bike rider?
BMXican!

Thought:
You can purchase objects: blankets, clothes, food, phones, anything. But they wear out. You purchase them and they don’t really adapt or change. People do. People are exciting. People are priceless.

Bex said:
When I was young I went out so hard on the weekend I ended up calling monday “bucket day”.
Because you spend the whole day laying down in bed… or on the couch with the bucket.

The scary idea:
We need more and more of less and less and this is what we do and don’t get.

“There’s a jumper in every drink” – beer armour quote. Hilarious.

What do you call a really nerdy dog.
LABRADORK.

I don’t like it when you ask me questions I don’t want to answer.
I don’t want you to roll your eyes if i’m bringing love.
I’m looking at you.
I like you.
I like you a lot.
I don’t know how to express myself normally past this point.
I will walk away for lack of a better move.
I am lazy.
I won’t fight for you.
I won’t give up on you, not in my heart.
I will hope for the best.
I wish you all the best.
I don’t want to see your fucking photos.
I really couldn’t care where you’ve been.
I like the look of you.
I love your mind.
I enjoy sharing my opinions
I want to say things that make you smile.
I like that you can surprise me.
I crave your attention.

My ears are ringing.
I shared the love tonight, and got the bare minimum in return.
Wanting something more? Home alone.
What is there? What can you say?
It’s the weekend. Breakfast, family.
Night time surrenders to day, and the ugly scars of your past are exposed unless you’ve risen early and wrapped yourself in bandages. But those bindings hide you, and they are either restrictive, cutting off your circulation or are made from toilet roll. Shreds fall from your body, the exposed flesh goose-like. Pockered and torn. Ugly. You’re attempt to hide yourself has failed, you are naked in the worst possible way, mindset-frantic. Scratches appear on the surface, and grow deeper with their unveiling. Biting down on your own teeth, clenching until your gums ache and bleed. The taste of metal, melts thickly down the back of your throat and you stare. Transfixed.

You’ve let yourself down.
Alone.
What could have been.
You make me sick

Drinking the water from the hot water bottle.
You are alone, exposed and strung out.
The gallows await you, you handsome lonely young man.
The love you have shown will not be repaid you.
Die.

Having moved back home and poromising myself to spend this year on guard- last night I was tested.
A great friend from Melbourne, her on the rebound came and stayed with me. I don’t know what she expected but i’m not that guy. “Rain makes me confused” who says that?

We have no history, just friendship. I feel I place emotional value in heightened physical relations. Don’t fucking come near me, I’m a mindfield of emotions that neither of us should have to deal with. If we have sex, it will get messy.

Enjoy my company, stay at my place, take a hot water bottle to bed, don’t expect anything that wasn’t there between us already. Furthermore think, don’t pry. If I knew the answers to your questions… Great. But do not surrender your common sense, do not ask for the sake of asking or filling the void. Bring positive energy, embrace my friends, chat to them.

“What do you want from this relationship?”
“I know you don’t want to commit and you want to keep it casual, but I need to ask what’s going on after us kissing last night?”
“You’re sexy”
“We can just be casual with benefits if you want”
“I’m going home soon…”
“I’m going soon”
“Hey yeah I stuck around, but i’m probably going soon”
“Just tell me when I should go”

-Leave me alone i’m here with friends.

Moving on.
Mountain today.
Beach.
Coffee
Lights
Airport!
Dad’s home (sunburnt)

What’s the difference between a well dressed man on a bicycle and a poor man on a unicycle? A-tire.