What do you say?

Started my day,
Shorts on, little workout.
Out the door!

Damn thee legs month!
Tonight is the TSO, pumped.
Frost on the road. A bike riders nightmare.

I did not admire,
Cold sweats did I perspire.
Wished I be infront home’s fire.

Work was busy,
Breakfast skipped.
Then came lunch.

Caught up with Tilde,
From melbourne she came.
I double dipped,

Food food food.
Zany and wild,
Talk of Art and the toilet.

Then to buy a chook,
Where life then took-
A hazardous turn.

A turn for the worse.
Lisa’s husband diagnosed,
With cancer.

So I ate my chicken,
Pesto, red and green.
I thought what I should have said.

I thought of what could have been.
I dreamed of health.
Wealth spent on food o’ so lean.

I returned home,
Asked mum what did it all mean?
Mum is delicate,

She choked on her words,
Close to tears she said something
Incoherent, her eyes brimmed.

Tears welled up,
She rushed from the room.
Give peace, give love, give money.

I laughed at that.
Poor fragile soul,
She was cooked as my chook.

Now I sit, happy Buddha stomach,
Pensive, restless, anxious.
My afternoon missmatch,

The study plan out the door.
I saw Tilde,
And will see Elouise before night.

Will I be tired?
Have I wasted today?
Working and such, for minuscule pay.

Tonight I’ll run,
Run away like my day.
Today, like every single one-

Of yesterday’s days.
Fade and …

And thats it.

You start each moment anew.

Stop.

But you don’t stop, that’s impossible. You hurtle through moments. Each moment a landmine goes off. You start afresh.
You respawn. Each moment is influenced by the moment adjacent to it. The last instant I was writing, so now i’m still writing. My flow is the same beacause i’m on a roll. The snowball effect of the last instance, the weight of the moment rolling through, don’t contemplate! Don’t even think! Roll on, into the next and the next and the next and the next.

This moment. Fresh.

SPACES IN BETWEEN.

The taste in my mouth, the ache in my belly. Today’s newspaper, its relevance? Yesterdays snowball. To pick up and throw and whomever you please. To fall to the ground, scrape up your knees.

The alcohol consumed, riddles your brain. Later you think, that you wont feel the pain.

But it fills you up, not delt with, unchanged. Like a diaper of shit, the smears and the stains.

The road map you wrote,
the feelings you felt-
as you rushed from the room.

Your emotions they float.
reeling, I feel dirty with guilt.
To soon, too much to vast.

Were they fake?
Do I comfort? Are all my hugs used up?
Where is the pity, where is the help?

My stomach aches.
Yestermoment remorse.
I wish I was free of it

A happy divorce!
Unfortunately not so,
Be there a horse for this course?

Perhaps i’m talking shit,
What would I know about it.
The majesty and magic of a unicorn in need.

Alas i’m fumbling,
scrambling indeed.
Time to study,

Be learned,
Change who I am.
Become an adult.

Take myself seriously.
Build a cloak around myself.
Don’t be witnessed in the sand-pit.

Be an adult!
Choose and be occupied,
Clean up that shit.

Again i’d rather think,
nothing now’s connected.
The dots and my learning

Aren’t directly related.
Heirs of this.
And airs of that.

Wrap them about yourself
Crap on, like your bookshelf.
Measure your self worth.

Count your thing,
If you feel that it brings.
You back down to earth.

Fly on your swing.
Back, up and forward.
The moments in life aren’t related.

You’re just swinging.
Swing, swing, swinging your thing.
Heirs and airs are fated.

Pass on what you’ve seen
Now that you’ve mated.
Know where you’ve been

You’re here now, at the end
From where you’ve come.
Somehow, forward-

Somehow,
Pass on the the future.

Each moment, was now.

Lisa, I pray that your loved one survives cancer. Bad things happening to good people.
I covet my heart, lest it break. There is no justice. Rage against it or be at peace.
In our hearts and in our minds we pray.

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