Layer level and meaning

Poly. Amour. Armour.
Multi. Plied. Vale.

Pol. Lou. Lex. Ari. Cami. Dani. Ebs. Fin. Ger. Hen. Imi. Jes. Kit. Lid. Mel
Nik. Ori. Pip. Quin. Ren. Sid. Tam. Umi. Via. Xee. Yen. Zel.

Do you like to go fast she asked. I drove slowly, looking out at the glitter of lights. Yellows and greens. Low and light whites.
She shivered then coughed when I made her laugh.
The lights were beautiful, man-made beauty surrounded me.

I laugh at the doubles.
The language of it all. Her eyes picking songs, but the words were there.
I’d tried to forge close, but she tore away. The language of it all.
Food, money, blown for happiness.
Measuring it all. The utility, the bullshit.
The wastefulness of it all – and how slow and quickly it all fell out of whack.

“What am I saying” she will ask.

And I laugh. I laugh and laugh, because otherwise i’d cry.
Yoga and competition and running and food and people and it was all so shallow. Hunger and jokes that are veiled. I’m only using you for your Tupperware she says. It could well be true. Good on you.
Enjoy my sweets. Your efforts are weak like your leaching.
You aren’t worth it to me. I put out too much for too little return.
Protect yourselves. Why do we set such high standards.
Next time i’ll be better.
There wont be a next time I don’t think. I’ve looked into the shallows and made a judgement call. Under 100 dollars lost. Time and effort and advice.
Some other time my lady; I tried and tired of the formula.
Norms, normal. Normative. Sack it all. Jump in feet first to the cold.
Ribbons pinned to my chest feel as prickles from pines,
climbing up spine. Yellow turned orange, as rind.
Pitted, pruned skin, I win and swim. The walk and things I wanted to do were done. No kiss and tell. Just meet and talk and walk and lie and lie and lie and lie and lie and lie and lie and lie.
And you catch me.
And I say I go slow.
Cars are bullets with someone’s name on them. Driver? Passenger? Stranger?
Bikes are razors that we systematically have the opportunity to slit our own throats with daily.
Don’t speed. Don’t speed. don’t speed.
I like to go fast sometimes. It depends who the passenger is.
I take the scenic route, but you’re heads down… Listening to music.
Shiver. Shake. We miss the good while I explain the bad.
Welling up up up.
Dinner’s on me. Formula. Chair sliding, conversational.
Hiding behind food, the nonsense you talk.
The neighbours. Dropping so much.

I am wrung out
Last drops until dry.
Finally I do up
my fly and look down.
Down over the coast. Two hills.
No sharpness to their peaks.
Just a faint
red glowing light
to guide. planes maybe.
A vehicle’s call for passengers and all.
Down it dims,
Beckoning, Falling.
Reckoning, Calling.
your name –
My mind, leaves you behind like autumn.
Shedding, wafting spell, smell and bell.
A ringing in my ears. Hears it all-
Here Hell cascades.
No black nor white ball.
Just fall… fall… fall.
In love.

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