Last night was nice.
The day of getting back assignments was a stress, I did far worse than I expected in one and far better in another. What a strange strange thing.
Came home late to crepes and delicious spreads.
We played cards.
I shared my days thoughts that i’d had in the sauna.
The pool was closed that day.
Today I went to my first Ice Skating lesson with Kat.
She’s a brilliant teacher.
I bought her coffee and opened doors for her to repay the favor.
We talked of all things, she’s traveled the world and would like to visit Australia.
Work and school.
Procrastination; involves drinking.
How did the essay, 75! Fuck.
How does, it.
Black Friday; Apocalypse.
That’s a weird, stat. “how many people died”
Grade 12 anthropology.
Teaching is not a double blind.
Conflict of intrest.
Oh my god.
Essay: Means try.
Between 3 topics.
Social media. US election
Watch a Doco. “Something about liberal media”
Something like Gladsotone’s Media.
Fuck that shit.
Happy Days- T.v show?
Taxas Sharpshooters fallacy, you’re going to get some random distributions. Coincidences happen.
Me absurd? How Absurd.
How as in how much. Like, on a scale. What a joke!
Why is poetry so unpaid?
What do people avoid up?
Publications, fame?! Only after death.
I need to reiterate my position here.
A just want. To make poetry accessible. Where my culture and education skimmed.
And the thought to milk my efforts rather than have them confronted and dashed.
Brainless oaths became my pastime and passions.
Where I could have spake adored words of d’orsay, moods, expressions of boredom.
The communication divide.
French and English. The broken role I play. Expectations.
Language becomes unnecessary, when people become more drunk.
I arrived at the party with nothing to say.
I don’t want to influence people. And we’re all friends, but i’m not sure it will last.
So its easy for me to sit quietly and assess, be true to myself. Think my honest thoughts. Scattered and unmending. Pointless to be not abstract. Needing full explanations and history. But relax. I have time, I came here with nothing to say.
Don’t apologise for speaking your mother tongue. What you say doesn’t matter to me, and if it does, its something for me to practice, something to learn. Chip away at. It takes time.
As you become more drunk. Unending, unbending, unfriending. So many options.
“And so they spoke in french so that things were told as they should be.” And there were no interruptions. And everything was distinct and distant.
Listen to KUNGS.
You are to opposite of low-hanging-fruit.
By the light of the axe
in my secret life
I am with him
This language of virus
Oh heap and thrust
Nothing is decided but is told
Where paradise storms
Bones kiss sour air
And undo the folded line.
Amigo Express – for travelling on the cheap as a student, on the road.
“Spanish Spanish” – or some other kind. Like mexican, or Venezuela.
The million dollar question:
When sayings are out of their temporal reality.
PATRICK: You need to go paddle boarding!
Hipster Jesus (when dressing up for the 90’s goes wrong)
Start saying: “Toodles” more.
Are humans, HUMANITY, becoming more resilient to death with technology? And with our exended lives becoming less able to evolve. The reproduction is slower, therefore out adaptions and innovations are dawdling. Is this a possibility?
Invention vs Innovation.
Leadership or management. Similar, not the same. Fields of study?
(Historian, Futurist, Current)
“My dad wrote a porno” – watch the podcast, its supposed to be funny. He was like 60?!
The perfume she wore was soft, mellow, gentle and somehow reminded me of old times and Nintendo 64.
1 Severe or strict in manner, attitude, or appearance.
2 Living conditions or a way of life that have no comforts or luxuries; harsh or ascetic.
3 Having an extremely plain and simple style or appearance; unadorned.
Listening to reggae. Robot heart.
Isn’t it conceited to think that people have a soul?
As to say you could ever know anything.
To give a deeper meaning to something that you can only hope for.
Lets all put on our white coats and find.
Not find answers. But in out coats, we could find things outside of ourselves.
Minimalist. Referential to being young, innocent, uncovered and vulnerable.
Basic, primitive, simple, honest, unadorned.
(18th nov, 2016, 17:22)
I cannot choose for you.
Ok, give me options and i’ll choose the second.
List of movies:
What dreams may come
Pele: Birth of a Legend
Inside Lewyn Davis.
500 Days of Summer.
Eternal image of the spotless mind.
The royal tenenbahms
Syndoche, New York
Lost in translation.
Death is the location of all impossible signs.
“Fascinated by nothing visible”
Talking as a self gratification.
Touching and tasting oneself.
Who am i.
What are we humans
We shall not know, for we are the image of our own desire.
Too close to ourselves.
Not like Pickup. Not like Harry Jordan.
Black and White.
The infinite pursuit of an absent object.
OH MY GOD: Memory bank, dipping white toast vegemite, in milk.
Putting ALL the spreads in a sandwhich.
The mind rainbow.
The revolt of my nerves.
The clash of enjoyment.
Elizabeth: I was in Macdonalds yesterday with a friend. She was buying food and as I looked around, at all idle hungry people, yes I smiled. I thought of how you and your boyfriend met, how he chatted you up at a fast food place in great. Talk about speed dating -ha! It made me happy at the possibility of love to blossom in all sports of places. That it could be so diverse and widespread is great. Love, all around the globe, hot spots everywhere, so much potential. Virtually surrounded. Multinational, bringing love to you for such an affordable price. Like love though, i’m not sure how healthy the fries are and how trustworthy the burger, the motives of the salads or ingredients of the icecream. Too much and you get fat or sick or terrible skin. Its a beautiful temptation, love. So sweet and salty. But i’d rather drive by than drive in or drive through, i’d rather meet someone some other place.
Met at a party at party, in his apartment, (the brooks next door), and i was sitting in his spot, and thennnn…. He sat down next to me 3 person couch, which had four people already.
Contrast to Wildred Owen’s Poetry Style.
“I had mystery, I had mastery”
Mental choice between functional working words of fitness. Highlighting, lighting up a part in the brain where there is a link. -hotspot.
Auntie Carol: Flowers.
THE HUB ROMANCE – Sketchy.
Take away love.
We need squirty bottles and drinking.
A man owns a dear with no eyes which is always trying to have sex with a sheep with no legs.
-What do people think about that?
They said it had no idea with its head in the clouds.
Wait let me get this straight:
You’re coming here from Australia, into the USA. We could just send you back, to where you come from.
And it isn’t a big deal?
We stood in line, bored as hell.
In can the grinch.
Sarcasm, voice tones swell.
Anybody in a pinch?
Weird looks and blue suits,
Suspicious people in line.
Carry any kind of vege or fruits.
Some nights alone with Megan.
Not wanting anything, but to explore her body, hands touching and mapping.
Pushing, groping and massaging. back breasts, shoulders arms hips,
Oh the hip bone, only recently trumped by lower backs for sex appeal.
Beautiful butt, back and thighs and hugging.
Holding tightly, put to need. Yet needless. Hot, lay-desiring. Frigid with wants conflicting remote and remorseful. The deed, grappling was enough barely with strokes and motions from limbs, but not what they wished to be.
Remember when Jed said that i’d done all that running to make it into the senior team.
And I told him he was wrong. I ran because I was angry and if I didn’t that I would do something I would regret.
His reaction was a storm of silent emotion and shock, visible, guttural. Almost a growl, a joining battle chant. Indirect fatherly accompaniment. I wasn’t quite afraid. I was on my own, explaining as best I could and my father matched me, willfully or in some kind of shocked reaction. There we stood. Silent for a moment. Scattered thoughts ricocheting in the pulp of my mind. I dismissed the conversation frowning and went for another run.
I think this follows from a conversation I had in the car with Dad and Garry. The told me I wasn’t fast enough, and me telling them they didn’t know what they were talking about. Then them telling me they did know what they were talking about “we’ve been there mate”, so I told them to get fucked.
Never let anyone tell you what you can and cannot do.
Jake had a dream that I took the bathroom sink with me to New York.
Oh the sick thought:
There’s always a silver lining.
Define Tryst: A private, romantic rendezvous between lovers.
Karma will get me back, bad.
Don’t worry i’ll suck off a homeless person and it will all be good.
Gabriel- owner of qui pense cafe.
Me and Thomas.
Book of Mormon.
Zeal without prudence is like a ship adrift.
“I best be off to class”.
haha – yeah, “You best be off to class, although you do have a lucrative career as a felon”
3 – “Do you know what lucrative means?”
2 – “No, but if I cant use words I don’t know how to use, then we’re going to have pretty short conversations”
3 – “I had planned to study all day, but I ended up just stealing this bad and listening to loud music”
4 – “people jizz in people, cum, whatever”
wilfred- Canadian Netflix (no good) Man’s dog days.
H – Tongue twisters.
Try not to do anything more morally ambiguous tonight if you can help it.