shouldnt have had that coffee

back to being human.
A fancy wank-
you know expensive because you beat off into a condom.
They cost money you know. Poor people can’t afford them ofcourse, so you’re just beating off into money, for no reason. Expelling surplus energy. Saving society from it. A bit of self pleasure and leisure.
-You’re not invited to the wedding.
-Hierarchies exist

I once made a mistake of asking a dark haired woman about my age “what do you do”.
I thought it was general, friendly and open ended. She took issue with the question saying it was grounded in posturing and sizing one another up. Maybe she was right. I’d been invited over as a friend of a friend, a BBQ of sorts, a social gathering. She was making me squirm I think. I played along.
She turned out to be a cleaner at UTAS.
I said great that’s fascinating how disgusting people are, how wasteful and thoughtless people are. I said it would be insightful to realizing just how quickly things get dirty and the level of dust akin to growing on all things seemingly suddenly. Strange. She didn’t like what I had to say –
She’s a cleaner and she had a problem.
I should have asked if people like jokes. I didn’t realize that ‘do’ denotes or connotes profession. She took it to mean “what is your livelyhood? How do you get through the days and contribute value to society, and so on and so forth”.
She decided to take pity on herself. “Do you like Titanic>?”
-Will we all go down with the ship, or just the captain?
I hated her for her failing me, socially I felt that this fight wasn’t my own.
Perhaps it was, my question triggered illness.
She’s the sort of moron that pours bleach or drain cleaner into the sink and then before watching it bubble down decides the issue must be somewhere at the U-bend. Naturally the fix will come from pulling out the piping, unqualified the outcome is a face full of bleach eyes like drains. Bloodshot,smoking, milky or black. I had to witness the triggered blackness as a guest in a new hovel. Trying to strike up conversation and unhappily letting my good intentions be turned back like the metal prongs of a fork you’d use to feed a learning child.
-Perhaps this tirade doesn’t demonstrate my good intentions.
-Honestly though, good meaning aside one always has a false story. Lie and lie and lie atleast sugar coat. Distract, move on and change. With good humor, pleasures are ours and words are our tool. You poisoned my hear, my confidence and out beginning.
Then came the pale, beady-eyed, red haired partner.
That breast focused piece of waste. Agitator and past stuck slime. You’ll need all your cleaning talents for that, gloves on and you’ll still come out dirty. I pray that the house caves in and you’re out to return to realise that its not what’s inside that always counts. Sometimes the brave fortification is all you have and that’s the passable point of shallow focus that anybody as a guest will be able to percieve. I was in your home and you gave me gruesome strangeness and callous obscenities. Unassailable hate, lust, timidness and misdirection.
Anything can be politicized I call it ‘politicked’. Cast in a light of either good or bad.
I hope I’m invited to the wedding, you’ll have my blessing. The haunted house of inner disgust at self, shared with all that ask a question to crack silence, misunderstood sickeningly

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